…I usually turn around and go the other way.
But then, a couple months ago I joined a running group to train for a
5K. 3.1 miles may not sound like a lot – and indeed, it really isn’t – but I
went to the first meeting skeptically. We used the “Couch to 5K” program,
alternately running and walking, building up endurance. I was skeptical about
my own ability, about whether I'd actually follow through. Never in my life had I run a mile – not even in gym class when
we did fitness testing.
For the last 2 months I have gone to all but one of our
Tuesday night group training sessions. Most weeks I have trained 2 other times
on my own. I have purchased, and used regularly, a foam roller for my aching
shins and calves. I have rubbed copious amounts of Tiger Balm into my legs. I
have hydrated, and hydrated, and hydrated. I now have cold weather running
clothes and have done many, many loads of laundry, trying to keep up with my work out
schedule.
The biggest leap in the training program comes in week 5. We
went from running 8 minutes, walking 3 minutes, running 8 minutes to running a
continuous 20 minutes. I was SO nervous about this jump! I called my sister – a
runner and fitness pro – for inspiration before heading out the door on a
chilly and cloudy Sunday afternoon. I told her how nervous I was. That I was
worried I would feel like stopping. That I wouldn’t be able to make myself keep going. That it would be too hard.
It was during that conversation I realized a deep truth
about myself. I do not do things that are hard. It was astonishing to sit back
and realize that I have arranged my life so that I don’t have to do difficult
things. I suddenly discovered that I generally do not challenge myself.
Usually, I take – seek out – the path of least resistance. And, to my chagrin,
I can be a quitter.
My sister gave me an excellent pep talk. She assured me that
I could do it. I’d been training for
it. I was ready for it. My brain might say otherwise but my body was able.
I left my house feeling anxious and uncertain. And then – I
DID IT! I gasped and groaned and kept checking my timer for the last 5 minutes
but I did it! I got home grinning and swelling with pride.
This morning I ran the 5K we’ve been training for these past
9 weeks. It was hard. It hurt. It rained the entire time. I wasn’t always sure I would make it. But I did.
And I feel good! I’m excited to start training for a 10K this spring and a half
marathon next fall. I am reveling in what my body can do and overcoming mental
hurdles that have been in my way for a long time.
Running has become a metaphor for me. It has challenged me
to think about myself and life differently. I have begun to wonder about and
look for other ways I have been living complacently and to get ready to tackle
things that might have previously seemed too difficult.
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